No inspiration

I've been not blog much lately... I have no inspiration to write this time , I don't know why :)
Our lives is still going on pretty well , the girls are good, the school has start back, Indy is still being homeschool, And she is joining girls scout, doing some sport and tennis twice a week.  In fact her 8th birthday is coming soon.

And I am still as usual juggling between being mom, wife and human being ( with needs of shopping, meeting friends and having fun ). But yet ... I still don't have inspiration to write :)

Oh and guess what... our 11th anniversary is on this weekend. Another year has pass!

Sexiness wears thin after a while and beauty fades, but to be married to a man who makes you laugh every day, ah, now that's a real treat."

Beauty of the soul

Life so short
So, think what is good
Speak what is kind and
Try to live your best , then this world will be bright and beautiful to you.

When money is lostnothing is lost.
When health is lost something is lost
When character is lost everythingis lost

Live like a candle. which burns itself, but gives light to others.
Impose your own terms upon life
If you don't you will have to accept the terms of others.

Look backwards with gratitude,
Upwards with confidence
and Forward with hope.

When you truly care for someone
you don't look for faults
you don't look for answers
you don't look for mistakes
you accept the faults
and you overlook the excuses

Have a stunning and aspiring day !
Remember to enriched your soul not just your apprearance.

2010 handbook

Good one to share. I just realized I don't have any new year resolution yet.
I don't want to goal for something fancy or anything... and I got this email from a friend.... and I think it is very do able and great !!

Health:
1.Drink plenty of water
2.Eat breakfast like a king, lunch like a prince and dinne like a beggar
3.Live with the 3 E's: Energy, Enthusiasm, and Empathy
4.Make time to pray
5. Play more games
6. Rea more books than you did in 2009
7. Sit in silence for at least 10 minutes each day
8.Sleep for 7 hours
9. Take a 10-30 minutes walk daily , and while you walk , smile!!

Personality
10. Don't over do, keep your limit
11. Don;t take yourself so seriously, no one else does
12. Dream more when you are awake
13. Envy is a waste of time, you already have all you need
14. Forget issues of the past. Don't remind your partner with his or her mistakes of the past that will ruin your happiness
15. Life is too short to waste time on hating anyone. Don't hate others
16. Make peace with your past so it won't spoil your present
17.No one is in charge of your happines expect you
18. Smile and laugh more
19. you don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.

Society:
20. Call your family often
21. Each day give something good to others
22. Forgive everyone for everything
23. Spend time with people over the age of 70 and under age of 6
24. Try to make at least 3 people smile each day
25. What other people think of you is none of your business

Life:
26. Do the right thing!
27. God heals everything
28. However good or bad situation is, it will change
29. No matter how you feel , get up, dress up and show up
30. The best is yet to come
31  When awake in the morning, thank God for it
32  Your inner most is always happy , so be happy

Time to move on... Literary !!!

Some of you have heard it, some have guessed it, some of you sms-ed and email-ed me, right after my post about another garage sales in August.

Are you moving?

Will you move house?

Are you moving out from KK or Malaysia?

What's going on with the garage sale , Sandra?

The answer is : yes. We are. But at that time, nothing is certain, so I can't give any more details answers. I most probably said : yes, there is a possibility of moving out, but where, and when... I can't answer that.

There was the agony of feelings every time we move. A bittersweet moments for me , specially.

When you know people, you love the place, you are familiar with all of your surrounding and then you need to move. I know we won't be here forever, but still , when the time come, the feeling kicks in. I still remember exactly how did I feel every single time we knew we need to moved to other place. And I think , it is a good mental exercise for me. What I do first is : To press my feeling for a while, let the facts sink into my mind. Of course there will be sadness ( I was not made of metal , you know! ) I feel specially sentimental for the house. Every time we moved, I feel hard to left the house, it is not our houses ( except for the one in Guang Zhou) but I feel so attached to each house we lived. Specially this one, as we stay in this house the longest and our second baby , Maya, was born and grow up here. And second I feel so attached to my maids. I always feed bad and sad to leave them, and I always try to find them a proper job, with a decent pay and good environment. I feel more sad because now Maya is so attached to my current maid. I feel that, if she will work for someone I know, I can send the girls photos and, sometimes maybe can see each other from webcam. And this time, my sadness is also for our dogs. I really really want to bring them , but the cost, the work, and the place where we are going to must be dog friendly too. So , it is not so easy after all. And if you know a dog lover, I will love to let them adopt one of my dog ( each)

And of course, I feel sad to leave my friends too. But again in this era, we can always keep in touch easily. We can send photos over emails, social networking, blogs. But with maids, they can't afford to have all that kind of access, and so with my dogs!!

So back to the main topic. Where we will move to this time? For that one you will need to stay tune for more details .^_^ . Hints: this is one of the biggest city in Asia, one of the most dynamic, and fast paced. A city of 20 millions people and a city we've been lived before .

What make me excited for this move is that I could share the process with my blog readers. That will be the first time!

To choose this Big City as our next destination was not an easy thing. Me and my husband loves in here in Sabah. The nature, the air, the beaches, the mountains, the life style. It is a good place to raise a family.

Just to share, when we first broke the news to our families and friends about 4 years ago that we are moving to Sabah. Most of the responds are negatives. They just can't get it, why... in the world, we want to move to a smaller scale, much much more quiet, not so famous ( excuse me, not to offend any Sabahan, but every time I said Kota Kinabalu Sabah, they gonna asked me until today, where? near KL? where? hah Borneo? oooh Sarawak that side ah? Near Kuching?) >_<. And trust me, I acted like an angry , offended real Sabahan. And I will start with the KK/Sabah's facts.

My dad, specially, told me that in much smaller cities, there will be much less opportunity for my husband to work. And we knew that. But for the sake of our young children we moved here anyway.

The first time we moved here I was worry that I will be bored , nothing to do, too quiet. But that 's what made me started my online biz. So there is the silver lining in every cloud right? :)

And because of that online biz I get to know many of great ladies. Who share many interest in commons too! Everything is linked and meant to be happen that way.

To be move around so much, also has taught me a good way to see anything from positve and negative side. Every place has it's own good and bad things and so does each person I know!

So despite the good thing about Sabah that we loved , it also has it's downsides . The city is lack of energy, dynamic, and textures. Don't get me wrong, the city has a lot of great potentials but there are not enough effort to make it much much better. The pace is too slow ( and this was the MAIN thing that drove me nuts for the first year we were here) . I felt sluggish, lazy, slow, not enough dynamic for me ( and trust me , I am not the " active type"). That is why, I always try to make effort to gather some friends, to share laugh, to enjoy our selves, to feel closer. I feel like people are living in scattered small groups all around the places. But maybe because I am an outsider here. And actually being the outsider makes me want more to know more people. I dont lock my self in my own "comfort zone".

To our surprise , Kota Kinabalu, is not so small after all. But yet, it is! I am still not use to it when people seems to KNOW everybody here ! In the real meaning! I was like wow! That is not easy! Gossips and rumors will spread like a bush fire here. Every one seems to know each other " history" . Spooky.... :-)

And for me , Moving is another chance to experience live! A chance to learn more. A chance to be humble and less ignorant about others.

Life is like writing a book, Your very own book! There are pages, chapter, and there are the main character(s) .There are the protogonist and antagonist

If you cant change the starting at least we can always change the ending.

This is the story of my life, my journey. Life is never dull , life is never smooth, life is never empty.

Like book, there are some pages you wish to forget and burn, there are some you want to keep forever, there are some pages you want to skip , and there are some pages that is still unwritten....

The change is unevitable, the "fall" will always wait there for us and so are the "up".

Life is rotating like a wheel.... you could be on top today and be on the bottom tomorrow. But the most important thing is our ability to hold on to happiness and to have keep faith!

If a person's inner heart is free from worries,indecision and fear, they will naturally have fewer complaints about the world around them, and their ability to hold on to happiness will also increase. Increasing our ability to hold on to happiness is the greatest thing we can learn" Yu Dan- Confucius from the heart

And for now... I am excited and sad about the move! It is indeed a Bittersweet moment! ^_^

The power of love

When the power of love overcomes the love of power, the world will know peace", Jimi Hendrix.

One of my favorite quote

Human beings, by changing the inner attitudes of their minds, can change the outer aspects of their lives.

William James
US Pragmatist philosopher & psychologist (1842 - 1910)

This is just a reminder to my self from time to time. To all the women out there through happiness and pain. Through Glory and failure and when we all juggling between job and chores. Make sure we will have fun while we are doing it.

Have a great week ahead peeps!

Finding Love

".....at the end of the day , we all want to find love. The journey to find the right love is the whole fascinating process...."

Drew Barrymore.

Some times we failed, choose the wrong guy, some times we left broken hearted, but there are a chance that we might found the love of our life...

If you 've found yours, the journey doesn't end there...
That is just a beginning of another journey to re-finding love and make it real and alive...

So from all the differences , can you find your similarities? Can you put aside the differences and make it works?

After dating period is over, you will see the "ugliness" from his side and show yours too.

The most important is : after years of being together can you still see the beauty of your partner?

Changes

Is it not the strongest of the species that survive,nor the most intelligent,but the one most responsive to change.
(Charles Darwin)

This is a quote I got from a dear friend's. And I think it is very interesting . Most of the time, we think that the smartest, or strongest will win or survive, but this quote mentioned about the ability to adapt or the responsive to change.

Personally I think this is true. We need to leave our "comfort zone" sometimes in our life, to be able to survive. We can find another comfort zone if we WANT to.

Apart of our adolescence life, I think also it is great to let our kids to take changes in life, to be more flexible. It will help us as parents too!

HOW?


Let your children used to many kind of different taste of food, a wider variety,
Many told me that I am lucky to have children that eat "everything" and not fussy. And meal time normally is a easy time for me. Of course it will be messy! But I don't have to chase and force my kids to eat.
This is VERY Helpful during family traveling and outing. We need to eat 3x a day, imagine if you stress up over what to feed your kids for every meals! It is like half of your day is gone.
Me and my husband also set a good example in front of our children. We eat everything on the table and we do not give many option to change the dishes even if they don't like it. We always say : TRY IT! and you will love it.
And often I told them that : Mamma is on a buffet restaurant that open 24 hours. What you see on the table is what you get.
Sound harsh? Actually it is for their best too. Of course I will serve the appropriate food for children
My In laws are all amazed by how well our children eat. Even it is a new food in a new place .


If your kids need a security blanket, or pillow or soft toys then it is good . You can bring this if you sleep outside.
If a child got a difficult time to adapt to a new environment , it will be hard for the parents too.
Don't blame the child or yourself. But once in a while let him sleep in different bed or room. So when he sleep in another place it won't be too scary for them.
If your child is old enough a sleep over at grandparent's place, Aunty/Uncle's place or even at friend's place will be good.

Don't be afraid to let your kid to experience changes. It will give them a new experience , and learn a new skills too.

If you must move your kids to other daycare /school , changing nanny, move house, move town, even country. It will teach them a lot of things to.
How to make new friends, how to adapt to new place and even how to speak the language.

Of course as parents we want to give our kids the best, but if somehow a chance come , and we refuse to take it because we are worry or scare that our kid will not like the change, how do we know if we don't try ?

Many of us , sometimes need to change job , many will resigned just a few months after. Even if that person is smart, hold a degree or diploma, has a lot of experiences, but they can't survive long in the working place. Can it be caused by the way he responds to change?

I am not saying that no body should not resign from a bad job. Of course you can, it is just the way we handle it. At least give it a try a b it longer before we called it quit.

It upset me , when I heard a person got a good opportunity but they were reluctant to move just because they dont want to come out from their comfort zone .Fear thet the children won't adapt well to new place, no new friends and no grandparents or other family. I think it is the parents who are scare not the children.

So in the time of globalization now, I think the other skills that we ( and our children) need is the ability to adapt well and how to respond to changes. Because we must admit that a good grades, hold a great diploma, have a lot fortune, speak 3 or 4 languages in the next 10-15 years it won't guarantee that someone will nail a good job.

( imagine if your kid gets an offer for a top position in a great company in another country , ok let's say India for example, but he must turn in down because he can't eat the food? or just can't be live far from you because he can't cook or do his own laundry?)

I am not suggesting that your life style must be change or travel to foreign country, or eat exotic food every single day, but if we live with an open heart, let them learn something new , instead of home -school- tuition- do homework routine, for instance let them learn roller blade or swimming? or taking sewing class or baking class or go to a near by park for picnic rather than go to mall ? or eat in the balcony once in a while instead of at the dining table?

It will make daily life more interesting too!

Another favorite quote of mine is from Little Buddha movies( by Keanu Reeves of course, my favorite actor):

To Learn is To Change.....

GEOGRAPHY OF A WOMAN

I've got man y beautiful emails from a dear friends, since I lost my outlook program so I lost all of the email contacts too! ( !##%#%#@#@$#@%)
So to make it easier, I just post it here! ( LONG LIVE THE BLOG!) , so let's start with :

GEOGRAPHY OF A WOMAN

Between 18 and 22, a woman is like Africa, half discovered, half
wild, fertile and naturally beautiful!

Between 23 and 30, a woman is like Europe, well developed and open to
trade, especially for someone with cash.

Between 31 and 35, a woman is like Spain, very hot, relaxed and
convinced of her own beauty.

Between 36 and 40, a woman is like Greece, gently aging but still a
warm and desirable place to visit.

Between 41 and 50, a woman is like Great Britain, with a glorious and
all conquering past.

Between 51 and 60, a woman is like Israel, has been through war and
doesn't make the same mistakes twice,
she takes care of business.

Between 61 and 70, a woman is like Canada, self-preserving, but open
to meeting new people.

After 70, she becomes Tibet, wildly beautiful, with a mysterious past
and the wisdom of the ages ... only those with
an adventurous spirit and a thirst for spiritual knowledge visit there.

THE GEOGRAPHY OF A MAN
Between the age of 1 and 70, a man is like Iran, ruled by nuts . .. . ..

MUAHAHAHAHAAHAHA!!!

So.....What is love, again?

In the mood for love? What is love anyway? No one can describe it in one sentence.
Is love is blind? Maybe... but without love we can't see clearly too.

So what is love anyway? There is many kind of loves
Love as parents, love as lover, love as couple, love as friends, love as a child, and love to God.

So what is love again?
I am still not sure...

Our love has grown from puppy loves to unconditional loves toward our kids and spouse. Love towards our Creator, Our friends, Our Country and all...

Some of my favorite quotes for love:

Love doesn't make the world go round. Love is what makes the ride worthwhile.

Franklin P. Jones
To have someone to be there with you, to share it with you in ups and downs I think it is LOVE.

Love does not consist in gazing at each other, but in looking outward together in the same direction.

Antoine de Saint-Exupery

This is a very true one , specially if the love end up in marriage. Are you looking at the same direction with your spouse? We don't have to be the same person or think a like....I've met many
great couple who are so different from each other but they are looking in the same direction.

We've got this gift of love, but love is like a precious plant. You can't just accept it and leave it in the cupboard or just think it's going to get on by itself. You've got to keep watering it. You've got to really look after it and nurture it.

John Lennon

This is the very truthful facts. Just because we are married we can live happily ever after like in the fairy tales . You just cant leave the love and expect it to grow own it's own. Work for it. Fight for it if you have too!

You don't marry someone you can live with - you marry the person who you cannot live without.

Unknown
You might can live with a few people. We can "accept" them. But you should marry the one that you cannot live without.

People shop for a bathing suit with more care than they do a husband or wife. The rules are the same. Look for something you'll feel comfortable wearing. Allow for room to grow.

Erma Bombeck

I couldn't agree more on this one. Some one that makes me comfortable, be there for me, accept me for who I am, but this doesn't mean that I don't need to improved my self.
Our love has grown and still are.... our love is not the same like 10 years ago. It's evolving and adjusting to our life as parents .

He use to ( and sometimes still ) sending me fresh flowers , he knows I love flowers bouquet, He once picked me in the airport with a huge bouquet of flowers , that was actually embarrassing for me LOL, he once decorated our bed room with red rose petals, candles, and arrange for a private dinner in a gazebo facing the sea during sunset.
But I don't demand that every time. I am more into practical romantic :-D...see how it goes and the timing too. Not easy to find time to do more elaborate things now with 2 kids as our shadows.
Now for me the sentence : I would love to grow old with you is much much more sexier than :
You look hot tonight.... Sound pathetic? I think it is more meaningful when a man wants to grow old with you.

So ....What is love, again?

Im still not sure ..... I am still learning to understand it.

But one thing for sure the love has found me. And I hope it found you too!!


To all my dear friends and blogger ( that is including the silent readers, singles or the broken hearted ones...)

Happy Valentines Day ! Treat your self something on Valentines Day with our without your love one. ( lazy afternoon nap, an extra cup of homemade coffee, cupcakes, a session of laughing with your bestpal, manicure/pedicure, facial, lingerie , how about me?? not sure yet....maybe will treat myself and friends for a mug of coffee and a doughnut? )

XOXO

I Like to be a "Teflon"

I am not talking about the cooking utensils , or else I will blog it in my Cooking blog.

I just read about it in a magazine that:

The key to happiness is to have a Teflon soul...whatever comes to you, you either let it slides or you cook with it...

And this sentence strucked me , and I realized we must be a " Teflon" too....
So I decided to share a bit of the Teflon side of my life

When I just started my online store, a few bad competitions scenarios did happen to me. Some people blogged about it, talked about it.. I just didn't want to make it worst by blogging back ( and I am GLAD that I did not, I rather wait and see until it will be cool off) Else I will look like a complaining old grandma. So YES... I let it SLIDE off me....
It can be a mistake, or misunderstanding but I never will make that thing ruin my day .

So with other not so nice things happened to us. Be it a ridiculous jealousy from others, rude comments or handling a cheap gossip , let it SLIDE ....SLIDE.... SLIDE...

And the most of all....I forget and forgive. Life is too short for hatred.

When I moved to a new country, new city, new place, new culture, new home, new people....
I will COOK with what I have on hands.....
You can't make all the things work for you then you make YOURSELF work for it!

When I moved to a country that I didn't speak or understand or write or read the language , I know that I must solved this out....as soon as I could! Blaming others for not speaking your language won't help much, so did complaining. I was in THEIR Country anyway...So I ended up studying in Shanghai .

Same with being married to a man from a different country. I know that I will be in touch a lot with his family. Because his family is a very close one. So I need to learn his language too.

I took morning full time class for Mandarin and afternoon private tutoring for Italian. During my pregnancy . I must took 3 buses and a taxi ride to reach the Italian tutor house. Happened in winter ( freezing damn cold of minus 5!)until my 8th month of pregnancy. I was like a walking snowman by that time with the hat, jacket , gloves and scarf...I just didn't have the carrot nose !
My dh asked me to quit when I reached the 9th months, as the place is about 15-20 km from where we lived. And the road is slippery on winter days. And he said if I fell I might can't stand up by my self because I was as big as a ship! LOL

When I moved to where we are living now we also needed some cultural adjustment. The city is much more quieter and smaller than all the other cities that we've been to. People seems to know each other. That's funny still for us. Because when conversation go.. most of the times it will be like : oh ya, he is my cousin, oh ya I know him, he used to be my boss, oh I live near where your friend lives .......

As for public transports , it is hard to get it here. Hard for me to find school bus for my dd, hard for me to go around. But I COOKED IT! I met a great lady offering to take Indy to school everyday. I got a couples of "boy friends" to bring me around the city when dh is not available( wait....don't start the gossip here.... the boy friends are taxi drivers!!! hahaha.... I got their phone numbers and just need to dial them and they will be in my front door!!)


When the shopping option are limited here, I opted for online shopping and love it and ended up by opening my own online store.

And learning to write and put my feeling and opinions in my blog.

So for those of you who are having a rougher time than normally. You got the option in your hand...
SLIDE it off or COOK it !

I wish I could know what I will be "SLIDING" or "COOKING" next......

So , what is your "TEFLON" moment?

I don't have the intention to showing off my life experiences, but we need to look at others life sometimes and take something out of it to learn . I am still learning everyday, humiliating my self endlessly , fall and stand up again, making mistakes, and I still like to learn about values of life through other people too.

A true friend

A true friend is not who wants to ride with you in your limousine but who is willing to walk with you when your limo broke down.

-Oprah-

Don't take friends for granted but cherish them all . And you will find a true and meaningful friendship not just based on how long you've been friends but how much of quality times that you spent together.

I've met a few people in my life for not a very long time but we have great connection and bonding too.

To loose a friend is an easy task. To gain one is much more harder.


Cheers to all of my dears friends where ever you are. You will know who you are in your heart!