Style over subtance?

My girls now have grown , and they show more of their personalities now. Indy specially,  I can see the character blooming in her. Some part she is growing fast but there is still the baby-ish personality in her , she is still very affectionate to mommy ^_^ , love to cuddle, and to be kissed, stay with the father, be the dad's lil princess. But then she also shown that she is more mature, independent and have a strong opinion on something that she believes in. She still need to work more on the responsibility part, and be more gentle to her lil sis. She is trying to convince me to let her color her hair. I told her : dream on !!! Won't happen!!!  ^_^.She is also a good reader , she has a great thirst for new book to read before bedtime! Recently  she's done with : Little rider ( a story of a girl in Amsterdam during NAZI's time, she has read the Alexander Graham Bell's biography) and she is asking to know more about Helen Keller and  Ben Franklin. I am always in the search of great new books for her!

Her lil sis, on the other hand, still is the  only baby in family. But she is growing fast. She just had her first sleep over! This is HUGE for her. She is so proud of that! She stayed with other family for one full day while I was busy with Indy's activity. She could ride the balance bike good now ( finger crossed she could ride the 2 wheels bike soon!!!), she can roller skates better  ( and she even asked me to take out the "baby wheels" as she is ready for the " real " wheels. She has a goal for her self this summer, she is going to learn to swim and be a girls scout  next school year!


They both are with an modeling agency right now. And I am not a very aggressive mom who wants to commercialized my girls. I didn't and will not force them to model ( unlike some of my " fb friends thought). I wouldn't do that if that is not what they want. I want them to enjoy it. And they asked me for more modeling job for them. I , honestly, not sure if they will get any  job in near future. But it is no  harm to try :)

Recently , we had an experiences , that actually some people do most style over substance. They ( girls like my daughters age) appeared to have privileged life, very safe environment, dresses beautifully, go to very impressive private school  but they forget the most important thing is live :
to be kind to people, respect other's feeling, and to show some LOVE!

This particular thing happened to someone my girls know and those girls also know. And  this person told me how different is my children comparing to those kind of girls. How she loves to stay with my girls, where she feels loved and respected. How kind and considerate is my children towards people. Well.. I am proud of my kiddos, they might not be the smartest ,prettiest or those who ride a great car to school or live in the most impressive home ever, but to have somebody else to love them that  means more to me than any other compliments .

is not when people praised them for they looks, or their intelligence that mean the most to me. But it's when people said they feel loved, appreciated and respected by my girls that what made my days!

 Have a great week

XOXO
S.R

Open mind, Open heart.

With the new school year started here in September, my schedule is been very busy too. Not to mentioned that one of our girl is still being home schooled. She loves being home school-ed ,in fact she told me : Can I be home school-ed until high school? And my reaction was : WHAT???

Jokes aside, it's not always been easy. I admit that. But we love the flexibility of home schooling,  I think if she ever go to regular school, that what we will miss the most. :FLEXIBILITY and the opportunity for her to be her self , to express her self  without being force into the stereo type of what girls her age should behave and should do.

My second girl is still going to local bi-lingual school. Her Mandarin level is very impressive I must say. My 2 girls socialization skills is great too. They can just make friends in a snap. So that is another example to burst the myth : HS kid will have social problem. Well not in Indy's case. I think the more she grow , the more she amazed me with her ability to make friends , to care about other or even to start conversation. I think someone ability to socialize has nothing to do with how she is educated, it's more from her personality .

She is joining the Girl Scouts this year. And I will co-lead with other parents as volunteer. We are both super excited for this. Since she is homeschool, we must join the troop that is under other private school. There are 6 girls including herself. And all of them , of course, come from the same school and know each other. I was worry at first that Indy will not fit in or will be ignored. But to my amazement, in a matter of minutes , the 6 of them are playing like best friends, laughing at Indy's silly jokes, and running around. 2 of the girls are still shy when they need to introduce themselves . Some are so shy that the mother need to stand up next to them to help them speak. But Indy, she just stood up and say : Hi everyone, I am Indy, I am 8, I am homeschooled, and that is my mom over there. , and my naughty lil sister over there. And my b'day is coming soon!
I mean she didn't make an " outstanding" speech but I admire her confident and to be able to do simple public speaking. I think that is was I, my self, lacked of as a student. I didn't have that much of opportunity to do public speaking in front of the class. Our old style system was still, teacher talk, student must be silent and listening  ( ermm in most cases :  teacher talk, student daydreaming ^_^)



So speaking of girl scouts I think she will have wonderful time . As the GS encourage the activities to be girls lead. Not leader lead. The leader will guide them but not telling them what to do. Leader will help them in a way but the last decision is on their hands.

This is my first time to volunteer, I respect and admire other mom volunteers, and I am glad to be part of them too. I still have lots of things to learn, a lot of question to ask, a lot of mistakes to be make. But I come with open heart, open mind, and I checked out my ego at the door. I come to see and learn and try my best. To push my own boundaries :)

The Girl Scout Law

On my honor, I will try to serve God and my country

To help people at all times

And to live by the Girl Scout Law

 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The Girl Scout Law

I will do my best to be honest and fair

,friendly and helpful, considerate and caring, 

courageous and strong

and responsible for what I say and do.

And to respect my self and others, respect authority

use resources wisely

make the world a better place

and to be a sister to every Girl Scout.

Education = Gardening

A great article for any parents. We should not just take care of the "plants" but also the soil and the environment. I like the way he said : the organic plants /garden may  grow slower but healthier while those who use chemical fertilizer and pesticide the plants could look better, greener , healthier but not good in  the long run!

Well ... happy reading, hope this will inspire you! :)

Organic Learning
Billy Greer

Unschooling is sometimes referred to as an "organic" approach to learning. Some people wonder about this application of the term and may think it refers to a "natural" approach as in organic gardening where artificial fertilizers and pesticides are not used. Actually, I believe the term refers more to a "holistic" approach in which the entire organism is considered and not just individual components. The same can be said for organic gardening; it just happens that this also tends to be a more natural approach. If you are new to unschooling, or have doubts about how it can really work, I can think of no better way to learn more than to try your hand at organic gardening. I find the similarities to be amazing and the results of both to be very rewarding.
Most people think of organic gardening as similar to regular gardening except that you don't use pesticides and you don't use fertilizers. People that try this approach frequently see their plants consumed by insects or wilting from lack of nourishment. They'll tell you that it sounds nice on paper but just doesn't work in real life. These are people who have seen and tried a few techniques from an organic approach but failed because they did not realize that an overall system is needed. You cannot expect success if you only adopt a few of the techniques.
Any experienced organic gardener will tell you that the key to success is to build a strong foundation, which means to take good care of the soil, not just the plants. Before you worry about growing healthy plants, you need to properly prepare the soil. There is no single way to do this because conditions vary from location to location, so first it is important to understand what you have. Go out and work with your soil. As you dig in it and feel it, you get a sense for whether it is hard and compacted or rich and loamy. By observing the types of plants already growing in the area you can also learn about the pH of the soil and mineral content. You can also buy kits that will help you determine what type of soil you have. Once you've done your homework, you can finally start doing some of the real work.
So, now you dig and loosen the soil and work in the compost, manure, limestone and other amendments that you have determined you need. It's not true that organic gardeners do not use fertilizers. They just don't use chemical fertilizers, so most of what you add will be more similar to what nature would add and will be slower to breakdown and slower to be absorbed by the plants than their chemical counterparts.
Now you've gotten your soil off to a good start, and you're ready to start planting. Your plants should be germinated in a very protected environment. The potting soil should be sterile. You carefully control the conditions to allow the plants to get a good, healthy start. Before you transplant them, you gradually expose them to outside conditions, giving them a chance to adapt. When they are ready, you put them in the soil you have prepared.
These plants have been given a good healthy start, and the soil has been well prepared. You will now find that they need less maintenance. They will grow deeper root systems and need less watering or fertilizing. Their health will make them more resistant to insects or weather. Their vigorous growth will crowd out weeds. Every year, as you nourish the soil, the plants will do better as they grow stronger, the roots spread deeper, and the soil continues to improve.
With a more conventional approach to gardening, you might get better results initially but not in the long run. Your neighbor uses a chemical fertilizer, and a few days later the plants are noticeably greener and growing faster. He waters them daily, and they stay green and lush even during the hottest days of summer. At the first sign of bugs, he breaks out the pesticides and sprays everything. That first year he may actually have bragging rights to the biggest and best looking vegetables. He constantly tends to the garden and seems to get great results. But if he continues gardening the same way for many years, he may start having problems. That rapid growth encouraged by his fertilizers may deplete the soil of necessary nutrients. Some are trace elements and things we don't really know about. Chemical fertilizers only provide the major elements required by the plants and do not replace many other nutrients. If overused, they can even leave behind mineral salts that can poison the soil.
The pesticides he has applied have successfully gotten rid of many pests, but have also killed lots of beneficial insects. Bacteria and other beneficial soil organisms may be killed. That means your neighbor has fewer earthworms working to improve his soil. Perhaps there are fewer bees or butterflies to help pollinate the plants. Fertilizer and pesticide runoff may also pollute nearby waters decreasing fish and frogs that would eat insects and their larvae.
Face it. Your neighbor has developed a system that may have gotten faster results initially, but requires constant attention and the application of expensive products. The plants are dependent on that attention and care, and are not capable of surviving well without it. Just look at what happens if he goes on vacation for a while, or moves away and someone with less time and money moves in to his house. The constant watering that produced such lush growth also produced shallow roots. Miss one watering during a hot spell and you can watch everything wither and die. The fertilizers can cause the problems mentioned earlier, but without them the soil cannot support the plants. Miss a couple of applications and the plants start to become sickly. This gardener has concentrated on raising plants instead of a garden.
On the other hand, you invested much more time and did more work initially with your organic garden. You focused on feeding the soil, not the plants. You made decisions based on the overall effect on the garden, not just the plants. Therefore, you did not indiscriminately apply pesticides to get rid of a few pesky insects. As a result, you had healthy soil bacteria and worms working to make your soil even better. Your garden may have gotten off to a slower start, but it improves every year. Since your plants were not artificially fed and watered constantly, they have developed deep root systems that help them find the nourishment they need. They are much more self sufficient and to not require constant care.
Thinking unschoolers do nothing with their kids is equivalent to thinking organic gardeners just throw a handful of seeds into the yard and expect a garden to grow. In actuality, both invest most of their effort into properly preparing the environment to encourage proper growth. If you worry that homeschooled kids are too protected and need to be exposed to the real world, would you also recommend transplanting tender seedlings to the garden before the last frost? Isn't it ironic that the plants that are the most carefully nurtured and protected initially before being gradually exposed to the outdoors tend to become the strongest, healthiest plants, while those that are thrust outdoors too soon often never recover?
Sometimes I see our home environment as the garden and our children as the plants; other times I see our children as the garden and knowledge as the plants. Each perspective has its merits. In either case, one of our goals is to produce self-sufficient learners with deep, strong roots to acquire their own knowledge and to provide a solid base for continued future growth.
Copyright 2003 Billy Greer

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Billy Greer and his wife, Nancy, are publishers of the FUN Books Catalog of books, games, and other materials to help parents in their efforts to produce life-long learners.
They also sponsor The Family Unschoolers Network, which provides support for unschooling, homeschooling, and self-directed learning.

Her feeling and her achievement

It's been an emotional roller coaster for our eldest daughter for the last 2 weeks. It is normal to feel sad, to say good bye to her friends. We do not deny it, and we do not think that her feeling is unimportant too. We do what parents need to do, to comfort her, to understand her feeling, but we also need to tell her that this is life, sometimes we don't like it, but we do not have a choice, and it is ok for her to feel sad. But it is important for her to know that she still can keep in touch with her friends, and she will make new friends, and that is is lucky to be able to make a lot more friends whenever we live.

I noticed the change in her. She lost her appetite 2 weeks ago, and she even wet her bed twice in a week ( when  she can read my blog, she will kill me to tell this in my blog !:D ) . I knew that , that was the sign of " children stress". Poor girl. But I do not want to deny that facts or just brush the issue aside. We can't do that to our children. Sometimes, we think : oh that is not important, or oh she will get over it, or naah..she will be ok , or no we dont need to tell her the truth.  The thing is, our children need to know the truth. Specially if that involving their life.

I do not tell them that we will come back to KK soon. I told my youngest that this time , we are moving and will not come back to this house again. This is not holiday. I don't want to lie to her and said ok we go ok?later we come back. For Indy, it is different, she knows what moving mean. And she knows that she will say good bye to her friends  , to her school and to her teachers. I told her, that I know she feel sad, and that is ok. She can talk to me anytime about her feeling. But , I told her, don't worry, you will make more friends there, and you will still be friends with your friends here . Just look at mamma, I have friends in Jakarta, Singapore, etc and I m still in touch with them . I also told her, that she is lucky to have all of this technology now, and she can chat with her friends with webcam, and when she can read and write better, I will let her to have her own facebook ( under my supervision of course) to keep in touch with her friends and our family.

Children will adapt well and faster in normal case. And I think both of them will be excited to live in a big city too. ( finger crossed) .

Indy also had her "school concert" last Friday. And on Thursday, her teacher announced to the class that Indiana will leave them and move to Shanghai. Every girls in the class hug her and said good luck and good bye to her, the boys shake her hands. I knew that must be hard for her to hold back her tears. Some of her friends gave her small gifts too. Her teacher told me that every students in the class love her and like her very much. She is a friendly and helpful girl. And Indy told me that she is the class clown :).

The teacher told me this a few months before when Indy came back from holiday, every one greeted her enthusiastically, so this time her teacher told me that her friends will sure miss her very much. I feel bad also for her best friends, some even told their moms that they are so sad that Indy will move . :(

Sadness aside, last Friday also a good day for her. On the " Awards Night" she got 3 awards! She got  " attendance award" , "reading readiness  award" ( for those who accomplish good progress in reading) and " Bible Scriptures memory award"( for those who can memorized the bible verses in a year).

Her school doesn't put the rank system. Instead they give awards. And this is great. And of course we are so proud of her no matter what. Less than a year ago, or when she was in the Kindy, she was consider the "blur" one. Not by the Kindergarten teachers though. They are quite supportive and said she is doing fine . ( I m not a fan of school who wants to push and force  the students). As we know, most people use the " reading skills" as the measurement to someone intelligent level. Some one that can read early will be consider as smart, and someone who read later on will be consider " slow". While I believe that is not true. And that is important to all parents to have faith in our children no matter what.

Indy shown a good progress and efforts to read. I didn't even force her at home, but I did intrigue her to certain books and stories. And this is what the school did for her. She got free time at school to borrow some books to read. So it was more to "dig out" her interest in reading rather than" forcing" her to read.

So to get the "reading readiness " award is a great milestone . She DID it! And for someone who has struggled to read to be able to memorized the bible scriptures is not easy at all. The principal even said, to memorized that many verses is not even easy for adult. So imagine what effort she did with her limited reading ability to be able to memorized that verses. ( shown on the photo's background)

In one sentence : We are very proud of you ,Indy! :) with our without award!

This is her painting being shown in the student exhibition. I think she did a great job!

"Spoon feeding" method??(edited)

Taken from Learning Beyond Schooling page , this morning I found this article:
Which related to my previous post "the cookie cutter"kids

UPSR shows only 5.7 pc of year sixers think critically


PUTRAJAYA, Nov 19 — The education ministry’s first Aptitude Test for Year Six students during their UPSR exams has shown that only 5.7 per cent (29,084 students) out of 509,885 pupils are skilled at problem solving and decision making, and only 34.34 per cent (175,101) in skilled thinking.


Education Director-General Tan Sri Alimuddin Mohd Dom This said today that this indicated that the children needed more training on problem-solving and decision-making.


Speaking at a press conference here today, he explained that the Aptitude Test was divided into two dimensions, namely Skilled Thinking and Problem Solving and Decision-Making .


Alimuddin said a student’s aptitude level was then categorised from Band One (lowest skilled) to Band Four (highest skilled).


The test results have found that when it comes to problem solving and decision making, the majority of Year Six students which is 47.71 per cent (243,258 students) remained in Band Two, followed by 28.24 per cent (143,971 students) in Band Three and 18.35 per cent (93,572 students) in Band One.


On the other hand, the majority of Skilled Thinking students lies in Band Three at 41.04 per cent (209,244 students), followed by 20.71 per cent (105,580 students) in Band Two and 3.91 per cent (19,960) in Band One.


The test also categorised a student’s interest into Academic, Technical and Vocational, Arts, Sports and Culture and Society, ranking them from One (primary interest) to Five (least interest).


There is a 39.31 per cent high tendency of candidates towards the academic, followed by technical and vocational (29.25 per cent), arts (19.26 per cent), culture and social (9.72 per cent) and sport (2.57 per cent). — Bernama




*****************************************************************


Problem solving and decisions making skill is crucial for the children education. If they can do very well in math and english, but , in real life , they can't make  a simple decision on what to draw or what to extra class to choose from, those good grades won't help much.  Speaking of which, that is why I always try to ask my girls on the "most stupid" or most simple things like what do you want to drink? what do you want to do later?
what do you want to read? That doesn't mean I will or must give whatever they asked for. But it will make them use to " choices" and "option" in life. And how important is it to make a good option in real life as adult. So they don't often choose the wrong way. ( and trust me in decision making , forcing them with cane wont help but will make it worse! Try to use cane for teenager, what they will do behind the parents back are even more scary!)


Recently, when I browsed for apartments in Shanghai, I always involve the girls. I showed them the photos, make them excited , to " see" their new " house" . And I asked " which one do you like?" that doesn't mean we will choose what they like. But it is more into the involving part, to show them that their opinions ( as silly or small is it) count! And just to keep the conversation and make them speak up their opinion. Indy said she like those with the white sofa, and big windows and jacuzzi ( it is far beyond our budget!!!) but it is nice to "dig" her interest, and listen to her opinion. Maya just said : nice! nice! I like that, and that, that, and that. Got playground ah? :P


Same thing when I prepared their birthday party, I always asked and let them look at the picture of cakes,and asked : which one do you like? what kind of cake do you want to have? Cupcake or Cake? But they didn't always get what they want. We discussed , sometimes if  the cake is big and if we do not have enough guests then I suggest them to change to smaller version or other type. Normally they are ok with it. And this is also teach them to be able to discuss and compromise with others, to be able to accept other different opinion too. To learn that sometimes they can't just get thing they way they want.


Spoon feeding method is just like forcing a kid to eat and swallow whatever the teacher prepare without the right to know or ask what is in the spoon. And like if parents don't give the children a freedom to talk, and to share their opinion.  They are not trained to ask questions, or think outside the box , and be creative. Will this do any good for our children in the future? But we as parents still can do something with the way we educate our children at home. Allow them a bit of freedom to talk, to ask, to give opinion, make decision, to teach them that they have the options in life, teach them about  the responsibility and the consequences  of their acts.

The" cookie cutter" kid??

As we are busy packing ( kinda) and browsing the potential areas in Shanghai to live , contacting freight forwarder companies for more quotation to send all of our belongings to Shanghai. I am also busy searching for more information in the "homeschooling" part.

The cost of International school in China is unbelievable high ( talk about around USD 26k./year)  for primary/grade school. Not that we must enroll our girl to International School, her Mandarin is not that good to follow the local school, and the semi international or bi lingual are not cheap too!

And since we are moving in the middle of the school year in China, so we think, it is better to homeschool-ed Indy first. And yes, I am fortunate, that my dh is ( again) agree with this. He was clueless about  homeschool before. But I made him have a better view on this. And we even ordered the books and browsing the curriculum together. And he even want to know more about the progress chart or the daily study schedule for Indy , so just in case I am sick or not available , he can "teach" Indy too! ahaha.. good one!

As Cel recommend me and enlightened me with lots of homeschool stuffs, I am more sure that, we made a good decision to do this. More than that, in a forum I joined, I read many parents are concern about the general school quality . And not every family can afford to pay USD 26k per kid/year. ( and that doesn't mean your kid will get the "best" learning experience).

One sentence that struck me :
The typical Asian students are  the"sweet cookie cutter": They are good  in Math and Science, but lack in communicating and critical thinking . They are smart and hard working (thanks to tons of homeworks) but not particulatry creative or bold. 

This reminds me of my recent trip back to Jakarta. I saw so many " molded people ( adults)" . They are just bland, similar to one another, closed minded , the "stereo type " kind of people.

Actually, I am not in doubt  too,  Can I  really do homeschooling with my girl? am I going to be a great" teacher"?, do I have enough patience to do it ? how can I find the time? What about my social life? Will I be stuck with my children 24/7? How if I get tired? Will I be discipline enough? Will my kids listen to me?  And the list is keep going on and on...

Our short term goal is just to home school for temporary. If we think we can't do it, we will enroll her into a regular school next September. But if we are comfortable of doing it , then , finger crossed, we will keep it that way.

Another good point I read from the forum:
Who will read your primary/grades school report when you are applying job? really ,who cares about that?


Point taken. I must agree. I know primary is the based , the foundation . But which school are you going, how much you pay for it, wont affect much of your C.V when you will apply for your first job.

If we can home school for the primary years, then go into a good school for high school and college or university, I think that will work too!

And , those books in sonlight are just so tempting. I would love to read and learn about it again! Some of the books/subjects in history for 7-9 years old will include:

• Mesopotamia and the first city-states
• Egypt, Crete, the Jewish people and Canaan
• The Greeks, Mycenaeans, Trojans, and Spartans
• Rome and Assyria
• The rise of Islam

 I think the subjects are much more interesting than what the normal ( chinese in my case) school would have offer. They even got some classic story to read, while in government schools ( I am now talking about Indonesian, Malaysian , and Chinese schools)  I don't think to read some great classic books is on the curriculum list!

So , keep my finger crossed, and wish me luck. I think moving to Shanghai is the "kick" I need to finally home schooled our  7 years old!

How about the "isolated" and not being able to socialize concern over home schooling kids?

"....conventional schools offer "socialization" through peer pressure, the stress of choosing between popularity and academic performance, and excessive attention to appearance."

Rachel Gathercole (The Well-Adjusted Child: The Social Benefits of Homeschooling)


That gave me a encouragement too. Beside, there will be a wonderful support groups for homeschooling in Shanghai and there are tons of activities to join.  


I know the road we are going to take is not gonna be easy one. We might fail , we might succeed, there will be a lot if hiccups, we will face a lot of down hills, we must be ready for bumpy ride and stormy weather. But hey.. at least I have the guts to try... and the passion to support it.  What's about that for now? And the rest will follow ( hopefully ) ^_^


have a great weekend peeps!

The grass and the flowers, which one is your child?

This will just a blabbing post about children. I saw this articles from Learning beyond schooling
and surprised about how homeschooling in Indonesia has been so inspiring now days.

The man behind all this is Seto Mulyadi, and he is a man with passion towards children education. I know him since I was a little girl. He wrote children songs, he is support the anti children abuse association and now he is support home schooling too.

This quote, I really like :

'Children are not grass that they can be cut to the same height. Children are just like flowers, they are different from one another.'

Seto Mulyadi, Asah Pena

And it reminds me that I must not treat and expect my kids to be the "stereo typye" for that age /gender. Because every child is unique.

Speaking of unique, even our family is not the same from others. Being the " expat" in "other" people country sometimes might not be too much fun for the kids. They do not have their grandparents here, so they can't visit or spend the weekend over the grannies place. And they don't have their uncles, aunties, or cousin to play with. They can't attend their cousins birthday parties, can have sleep over with them too.

But I told my eldest , that the way our family is. We can visit and meet her grandparents once or twice a year. But doesn't mean that we are not family anymore. She understands and accepts it nicely :).

I also told her that some family maybe just consist of a mom and the children. Other might be just with their grandparents while the parents are working some where far. Or maybe other children only have their dad around without their mom. But that doesn't make them less than a family.

As for the young one, Maya, for her that is normal. She got Pho pho and kung kung in Jakarta, and the Nonna and Nonno in Italy. That is just so natural for her. I think it has something to do with how , us, as the adults see life , if we see that our life is sad because we do not have our families here, then our children will think like that as well.

We've been friends which mostly are Indonesian , or other "expat" families during our years back in China, and me and my friends kind of support each other. We were pretty close and spent a lot of good time together, because we want our kids to be exposed to other families as well , but since we do not have our own siblings there, we still want our children to have other "adult" figure that they can feel close too, we were like the other "pillars" their children can lay on to.

I think it is healthier for children to have other " grown up " figures that they can related too, like aunts, uncles, older cousins, or grandparents .

And then the other things is about their appearance as well. We never want to emphasized that they are different because they "looked" different or that because their father is"different" or we are "different".

So for them , they are NOT different at all. Which is exactly the way I see my husband and my children .

When someone , who also happened to have children with mixed background or race, told me that they are worry to send their kids to any local school because the other children might make fun of the child because the child came from a mixed race/culture, I was stunned. It never occurred at all in our mind. They want to send the children to the place where they are also other mixed children or white people there.

Children are mean, they said. And since our children are different, they will be the main target at school , so we want a special school for them.

But again, mean children are everywhere , Not just at school. They can opt for homeschooling of course if they want too, but then how about when the children go outside in the neighborhood? play with their cousins? will they be mean too?

Ok... but remember ADULTS are mean as well!! Or...should I said adults are meaner?

We can't protect our children all the time for the rest of their lives, or can we?

Even if I could, I won't choose that , what they called it " cotton wool parenting" or the over protected children.

The children need to deal with the crisis in their life, but not by avoiding them. If so, they will turn out to be a "denying" adult, instead of facing and solving the problem, they will only depends on other to solve their problem ( like their parents?) for the rest of their life? and denying the problem and run away from reality over and over again.

I'd like to be the supporting parents, by the meaning that I would like to see my children to try to solve the problem on their own, or asking me advice for some, they might fail as well, but I won't be the one who will solve the problem , until certain limit ( depend on the children age of course). I want them to know that their parents are there on their side no matter what, and when they "fell" we will be there to "catch" them, but we won't " carry" them all along the way.

I want them to be a responsible adults, who can take the consequences of their own acts. That is how my parents raised me and my siblings.

".....give them the baits and not the fish!"

Great websites for your kids!

Hi Mommies...
do you like a great website for your children? I like it
I like to search and find some activities for my kids to do as well to let them learn the fun way

here you go

http://spatulatta.com/ Cooking for kids
http://www.hunkinsexperiments.com/ Experments
www.starfall.com Reading and ABC
http://www.thetoymaker.com/2Toys.html Printable paper toys!
http://www.dltk-kids.com/ Crafts for kids

Enjoy!!!