Lighten up, Moms!

Nothing sounds better than a children's laugh. Don't we all agree on this?

I love silliness in Children, it just reminds me of being " naive" and just to be a child. I m not really fond of kids who look or behave much beyond their age. Example? a 7 years old who thinks she is too old for some silly games, and enjoy the fun, and being silly and laugh at themselves and just sit or stand in the corner and be a very lady like or those who takes jokes and games way too seriously.

As you can tell, I am more into kids who just be kids. Be silly , be happy. Forget about being " in order" or "organize" or " behave good" once in a while can do them good. And being silly and be able to laugh at our self as mom will also benefit us.

Nothing will stressed kids more than a stressed out parents. Parents who constantly reprimand their kids. I can be that kind of parent when I had my wrong mood in a bad day. But I always try to make it up with my girls by playing with them , and just be completely silly and be a kid my self again . They loves when their parents can be as silly as they are in the pillow fight, water balloon fights or just a silly dance , shake our boom boom, or just do the silly drawing contest or simple tongue twister game. And it will just give the parent - children bonding.
Experts said that the best discipline tool is to play and bond with our children, they will see the other side of "us" and when we ask them to "co operate" or behave , chances are , they WILL listen. But if we are the kind of parents who just reprimand, shout, yell and ground them, they won't listen as much. Why? Because the connection between parents and children is missing.

Have you ever notice, that the more strict the parents are , in most cases , the more rebellious the children will be? The busier the parents are ( and if they don't spend much time with their kids), the harder for the parents to control them?

Put ourselves in the children shoes, if we never see our parents, what we do want is to cuddle and have fun with our parents first.But if the first thing our parents do when they reached home is to shout : Don't do that! Do your homework! Go to your room! Don't scream! How do we feel about that? I will do the opposite whatever my parents would told me too. Just to get the attention. It is better to be shouted than to be ignore ( they will go back to TV or their computer) after all!

Indy can't keep her face straight!

I am also enjoying my roles to be the funny and cool aunt to my nephews and nieces. The aunt who just want to have fun with them. That is the joy to be aunt and uncle! The chance to play and have fun with our nephews and nieces WITHOUT the responsibility to be their PARENTS.

And believe me, children need to have at least one or two funny/crazy/ cool uncle and aunt role in their live. I don't see my nephew and niece as much as I want, so when I get to meet them, I make sure we will have a blast. Their parents just will shook their head and laugh when their play and got silly with the youngest aunt and uncle. And one " unofficial" rules for us when we got the change to meet up is that : too lighten up , not to be so rigid with our children rules, and routines and just enjoy the time. Sure they will miss one nap, or miss one proper meal, or be cranky or too tired. But it is worth it. They got the chance to play with their cousins, aunts and uncles, grandparents . So an extra effort for the mom to calm the kid down for me is totally worth it. This fun doesn't happen every single day.

Imagine how boring a life could be for a kid who is surrounded by adults who only want them to behave on their best every single day, or to be surrounded by adults who can't have fun, but be serious and preaching all day?

And I am happy that my girls also have a different kind of aunts. My sisters are all different from each other and that is great. It will just make the whole " team" a complete team.

I will enjoy the silliness of my girls before all of sudden my girls will be the moody teenager who likes to locked themselves in their room , watching MTV or turning the music out loud or playing video games, and computer or just be on the mobile talking/whispering to their friends. And be anti social , specially to their parents!

Indy n Maya with their one and only Ciu ciu.

Have a great week , you all! No matter how much hard work we all need to do just don't forget to have a little bit of fun. A laugh a day can keep the wrinkles away! :-D

Indy at her grandpa's house ( last year) . Her grandpa commented that he loves how alive and spontaneous Indy is.

Priceless moments, Happy Mother's Day!

To honor my mom for this year Mother's Day. I think there is nothing I could give or say to her , to say how grateful am I to have a WONDERFUL mom like her. I have the most wonderful childhood, and all my sibling think the same.

My father also did a great job with us. He is the disciplinarian, but yet still warm and kind in his own way.

My sisters and me ( the shortess in the front) Laughed at something we can't remember but we all looked very very happy! Photo taken by my dad ( of course) at Bogor Botanical Garden during one of our Sunday's outing.
Another happy moment. This is our happy place, at the mountain in Puncak Pass. Look at us! So carefree and happy. ( Me and my sis Priscilla in the front and, My lil bro and my sis Jeanny on the back)
I was in the "oven" My cousin, Johnny, my sis: Vony, Priscilla and Jeanny and my mom with ME inside her! This was in the Zoo.
Still with me in the oven, yet it wouldn't stop her to bring my sisters to the beach! Imagine the heat and tiredness?But yet it wont stop her to let her other kids to had some fun!
It made me feel as I am a bad mom, to feel too lazy or tired or too hot just to bring my kids to the near by playground!
Love this photo so much!
My sibling and me ( look at my lil bro! so cute!) and my cousin Wen2 on the right.
also taken in the Vihara my dad used to go in the Mountain.
Again us in Cibodas garden. In one day we visited 2-3 places. Where did my parents gather their energy?
Jeanny, Priscilla and me in one of the most iconic tree in the botanical garden. Believe it or not, I took Indy n Maya to the same tree 2 years ago, but this idiot didn't take any photo!##$#%#$^$^#
My mom and ME! ( one month old)
My fullmoon dinner. My grandad passed a way just a few days before .
This is one of the MOST priceless photo !
And this is me again in my favorite rocking chair. I had curly hair! Can you believe it? hahahah

Thank for their guidance we all had grown up to be grateful individuals today. Our childhood taught us to enjoy this life as much as possible, be considerate to other and to accept people with flaws and all. We , the sibling, are 5 different individual and personality but yet we are one. Through our ups and downs, fight and peace, cries and laughter, misunderstandings and bad judgments,we will always be there for each other. And that is because we have a GREAT PARENTS!

We never had the abundance of wealth, our childhood is very simple and modest but do feel loved and cared for. And I think that is very important .

Dad in the middle of his girls and son . ( taken 2 years ago)

Love you Ma!!!!
Happy Mother's day!!!!

The best of both worlds

Thanks to minilebahsibuk for the photo!

One of the reason we left China for good for Borneo is that Borneo is still one of the greenest place in the world. With the amount of the tropical rain forest and big rivers. With the driving distance both to the beach and the mountain. That is the place we want to raised our children . To give them as much as outdoor experience as possible, let them run free and see many other nature places instead of just visiting malls and shopping centers and playing video games or just watching TV at home.

I was a bit nervous about this at the first place, like I said being used to malls, big cities, shopping and all.

My husband , as an outdoor person he is, always try to plan his one day off with us and he plan to do something different each week if weather and time and our energy permits.

I was born and raised in a big city, my parents house is in the middle of busiest place in Jakarta ( Chinatown). There is no backyard , no place to run around freely. But , that did not make my parents keep us indoor all the time. My dad, like my dh, is NOT a fan of malls and shopping. He, again like my dh, always planned our Sunday activities, and we always went to outside of the city, to botanical garden, museums, visiting lakes, zoo, safari, historical places, beaches, mountains. With the small car and 5 chidren, it needs a lots patience, guts and will to bring us all on a long trip EVERY SINGLE SUNDAY! ( yes every single Sunday!). And me and my siblings are still taking about it until today. Our parents did a GREAT job to filled our childhood with unforgettable memories. And we will never thank them enough for that!

I was a little bit more to city person, didn't like outdoor so much, and will freak out with ants, mosquitos, and sand or dirt. But, I always been eager to learn something and learn to loosen up a bit. So my husband did teach me to appreciate outdoor more, be more relax and not to freak out of small things. He said if a person be able to loosen up a bit , he/she will enjoy more in this life. No need to freak out or always want to be in control of every single things.

And I know he is right. And we also agreed on how to raise our children. We want them to have a great childhood ( not in material wise) but adventure and experience wise. But we feel , after being to live here for 3 years, we haven't take the full advantages of this place as much as we could. We still haven't been to Sarawak, haven't go to some other places here, one of it is the famous Kota Belud's tamu. We don't want to regret later , if we move, and then we couldn't access the beach or mountain easily. Or if people asked how long do you live in KK? ever been to Kundasang? not yet.. Go to island? Have you ever visit the Kota Belud Tamu? not yet?.... It would be sad isn't?

So , we will try to go to the beach as often as possible, let's say once or twice a month? or go to mountain, or go to the waterfall somewhere here . We will see and try our best, for the sake of the children. But again, we also want them to enjoy the modern world of today. Like the post title The best of both worlds.

So last week we went to the beach, just a near by beach , Tanjung Aru 2nd beach ( heard it from Maya's pediatrician ) . Not bad at all. The kids can play with the sand , but it was hot but my girls are ok, as long as I put sunblock on them.

When we go to the beach , we really get down and dirty!!! If we don't allow them to touch the sand or water , then for us , there is no point to bring them to the beach. After that we just clean our self with bottle water ( mainly for our feet) then we go to eat. I know for some of us, that sound disgusting, sticky, but as long as we wash hand and get rid of the sand, for us is ok. After eat we go home and then take a proper shower. A bit of delay wont make any harm. So that is what I've learn from my husband. Take it easy and relax !!!

The other time, we went to Pantai Dalit and normally we packed roasted chicken and have picnic by the beach. Or go to the taman something ( forget the name, I know the name but not sure, since it is a heroic name I don't want to simply type it here as it can be misinterpret as disrespect) near the Bukit Padang and we pack our lunch and picnic at the park.It was fun!!
And sure the kids will enjoy it more than just going to the mall and eating at fast food restaurant and collect the kids meal 's toys!

Our simple picnic at Pantai Dalit ( Dec 08)

can u find my husband?

@ Tanjung Aru 2nd beach, it is near and are ok for sand playing

Last Sunday, we went to the Crocodile Farm again. I know for some of you, this sound boring . For us, it was our 4-5th times here. I know almost all about it there ! Hahaha.. If we had family member came to visit us here, for sure the itinerary would be : Crocodile farm, kundasang, kudat, island. So I need to find other alternative for the future! :-D

One of the best thing being expatriate is that we always try to enjoy our moment in this place at this moment. Go and see as much as we can when we still have the chance, because we will never know until when we will be here. But again... It is not just apply for the expat family, we all will never know until when we will have the chance!

Maya : is that a bird?BIG BIRD!!

Maya thought that the deer were DOGS! hahaha...
And we have the Crocs eggs too! T-B : Crocodile egg, Normal egg and kampong egg.

Experience is the BEST teacher, wouldn't you agree? No matter how much we read and know about the theory, there is nothing like it when you see it with your own eyes or feel it with your own hands! (No I don't mean that you need to hold a python...It is just me! )

What the kids ( specially Maya)learned from this trip ( some of it)
That Crocodiles eat meat!
They lay Eggs!
Male deer have horn , Female doesn't.
Ostrich are BIG! They prefer to eat nuts and corn rather than leaves ( they rejected the leaves)
Mommy can carry a big snake!

Have a nice week !