Home sweet home

I've been living outside my own country just for more than a decade. Depends on how you see it. For some it might be a long time but 11 years can be consider a short time as well.

Through Facebook, I've meet many of my friends that I 've known from this past 10 years and some are even from my childhood, primary through high school and college friends.

For the last 10 years, specially the years that we've spent in China, I've met many the so called " expatriate families" . I known and be friends with a few Indonesian ladies that are married to men from other countries. We got that special bonding, not just for our mixed marriages but mostly because for living far from our home, and our family. We practically learned on how to become a wife and mom together. We learn how to cook our Indonesian dishes together ( so many funny stories here...I burned my potato, my friend's pressure cooker exploded, a rice cooker mishap and many many more!). And best of all we learned how to be a friend together. I think God had plan it for us to meet there and be there for each other.

Through our ups and downs, jumps and falls, to our farewell when we left China for good, we have learned something together and we inspired each other with our stories, with our failures, with our success, with our stories and with our life.

During this time or even lately , often someone came to me and asked me : Do you like to live here? Do you like it to move around so much? or oooh poor children, they must move a lot and it must be hard for them and for you.

I just can smile and said : ya it can be hard for us sometimes, but we are family. We rather be moved together than be in 2 different places. But I always try to get the best of it and try....we will never know if we gonna like the place if we never give it a try....

Or for other it might look easy and nice to live far from home . They said to me : oh how nice, you always move , see new places, meet new people... nice life ! But beneath that , we need to have certain skills to "survive".When people ask me : do you like to live here?
I always tell them that when I move to one place , I don't allow my self to think : What if I dont like to stay /live here?
Because , like or not, I NEED to be here with my husband and kids. So for me the IF I DON'T LIKE IT HERE doesn't exist in my book.
I WILL MAKE MYSELF TO LIKE IT! I will make friends every where I go... I don't care if we gonna be in one place for 3 months, 6 months, 4 years or 5 years. A true friend is forever. I don't want just because we will not live in one place forever makes me feel that I don't need to bother to make friends.

I believe , everywhere in the world , there is always a good and bad thing about it right? It is about how we see our life and how we live it. NOT where we live it.During my 10 years of living overseas , I found a numbers of ignorant people too. They never offer help to me who is new in town, for me that's fine, but it made me think about them , for sure they never live far from home, they took everything for granted. They got their parents' help all the time,speak their own language, live in their hometown . They are the people that is just too comfortable with their life and they overlooked something and take their life for granted.

The truth is....nothing is for granted.... we don't know how long we will live in this world. I don't know when we will move to other place. But time is just too precious.

A funny thing is , after we went back to my hometown or to my husband hometown and come back to our home , whenever it is...we feel aaah at last home sweet home....

So I believe that home is where ever our heart and family is. No matter WHERE is it.... my home will be always here with me as well as my husband and 2 girls :)

To my dear friends that I known in Shanghai ....This one is for you!

(R. G... you are an amazing woman, a true artistic lady, a great gardener, wonderful wife and mom, and now you are an ARTIST!!!! Oh my , Is there is something you can't do??? I know you can cook too!! And you speak perfect Mandarin and write and read Chinese ,and you speak German dialect too!!! And now you even drive in Shanghai....you made me feel like a complete idiot!! LOL )

(D.B.P.....you are just a woman of strength! Love your notes, love your recipes, best of all love your courage!!! Damn..if just every woman have your courage ! I know you've been through a lot ! But you made it with grace,girl!)

(S. Hui...Don't know if you will read this... :) I know you are busy with your lil angel now. You are one true friend, always be there for me ( remember when I locked my self in my apartment? hahaha...you came to rescue me! You are smart, sophisticated, so organized ( a total opposite from me), and you are just a great woman)

And best of all...These 3 amazing ladies are so humble , down to earth and just lovely and they are hilarious too!!!....they have taught me a great deal about life and best of all we are friends!
A true friend doesn't mean that we need to know each other for all our life, a true friend is someone who can touched your life and inspire you to be a better person.
LUV YA!

**part of this post is taken from my comment to D.B P 's notes about Cultural shock.

On that day.....September 11th 1999. FLASHBACK

Our wedding was small , and simple, just what we wanted it to be. Mostly just our closest friends and family. And my dh's mom to join us. We had a week of Tour de Java one week before the wedding, with all of our family, It was so much fun. We went to Jogjakarta, and Borobudur as well.


My boyfriend at that time proposed, via a long distance call, he was in Sydney and I was in Hong Kong. Far from romantic, ( no kneeling or flowers) But he did propose again when we met and popped the question, and of course I said : I do...

We planned everything, and it should be simple. My mom was more excited than me to choose the dress. I found it in one day! I want a simple dress, no fuss and not too complicated . It came with the simple lace jacket to cover my shoulder during the Holy Matrimony, but I can open it ( so it will be just a bustier) during the reception. Once I tried it on I knew that , that is "the dress" , it just feels right for me. And I love my hand bouquet , it was white tiger lilies and pink roses.

And I refused to wear gloves but instead I got a french manicure , and a fake tan! ahah...I am not a fan of fair princess, specially on my self, but too bad I am considered as fair person! My tanned friend always want to be fair, and me always want to be tanned. Life is not fair!!! (who said it is anyway)

We didn't have pre wedding photos like the trend now and the cake was just a simple 3 tiers wedding cake.

We were young back then, I was barely reached 23, and he was just 26.After 18 months of dating , he proposed on May, and the wedding was in September 11, 1999. We could have choose the 9.9.1999. But we did not. I never thought I would marry at such a young age , I planned to work and get marry at the age of 30....yeah right....:) I am 7 years ahead of my schedule I guess!

We got married in my church , Santa Maria de Fatima, where I went to school from kindergarten to Senior High. And the pastor is my childhood's pastor and he is Italian. So the Holy Matrimony was held in Indonesian and Italian.

My dad walked me down the aisle and gave me away to my husband. My mother in law cried her eyes out during the service. She told me that she never thought that his son ( my dh :) ) will ever get married ,specially at that young age, and she was so happy. ( maybe she thought no one gonna take her son as husband , so that's why she was so happy when I did ! haha)

The reception was in a Chinese restaurant , simple but great. Not too many food but just right..


We had our first child 3 years later. Un planned...:) we still want to enjoy a child-free life as a couple, but God had decided that we had enough free time together and start to be adult :)
with a real responsibility . ( Ok Sandra ....enough of playing around...now move your b*m and be a mom! )


Looking back at our wedding photos, It looks old fashion compared to the trend of the wedding photography now. And we didn't hire a photographer a camera man to make the video, instead we asked my 2 brothers in laws , and my brothers each with their own video camera to make the video on different angle. And then my best friends , spoke to the camera to say something to me, of course most are silly things and teasing me and congratulated me. But it was so much fun to watch.

The real marriage started a week later, I flew back to Singapore to join my dh there. It was hard at first to live far from my family and started a new life as a wife. I moved out from my parent's house since I was 18 years old. But I came home on weekends. But this time however it seems to be harder. We were young, alone, far from family. What we have is just each other. I never know how to run the house or how to cook before that. So it fell like a boot camp for newly wed for me.
Of course after that , things are getting better.

And after 9 years later, 3 countries, 4 cities, 8 houses, 3 jobs , 2 pregnancies, 2 c-sections and 2 children later , we ended up here for the moment, at East Malaysia. So far we like it here and hope we will stay here many years more. During all these years of journey as couple we happened to know many friends, some are great , some are outrageous , some are................well no comments :)
We have 2 children now and no plan to add more. Factory closed, thank you very much.....:)
And all this time we've been in good situation, not so good, and pretty bad situation just like all of you I believe. :)

It is a roller coaster after all isn't it? And life is full of surprise and it is like a box of chocolate...
you'll never know what you gonna get.....

But so far I like what I've got. Thank you , God! ( and if You decide to give me more kid, I will take that as a blessing from you , even though I've decided to close the factory, but please God just don't tell my husband about it. Hopefully he won't notice my big belly and the extra kid........) AMEN...

Due to my husband's request. I will not post the many photos on this blog. :)
I've posted it to a small of selected people at my FB . Sorry guys....
( See that is what we do as couple...listening to our husband request and "try" to understand his opinion, yeah righ... wait until he saw the other post with all of his photos in it...LOL...WAR will begin!!! TADAAAAA....
He cant understand the purpose of blogging and he is very protective to his privacy... Ok this will be my idea for next blog posting ( husband vs blogging :0D )

THANKS TO ALL OF YOU WHO WISHED US THE HAPPY ANNIVERSARY ! CHEERS!


And as we all know, 2 years after we got married, the whole world mourn for the 9/11 tragedy. It was an unforgettable day. And it all happened on our 2nd anniversary. Blessed all the souls and give strength to the families of the victims.